North of Carolina

As of this week, I'm officially living in the great state of Virginia... sort of. My new job requires that I reside about two hours north of Greensboro during the work week, while everything I love and hold closely is back in Carolina; North Carolina, as in "where the Bojangles are plentiful." In some well-intentioned attempt to ease the transition to a quasi-long-distance relationship, Megan and I even acquired a second puppy to ensure that things didn't get boring. Well, it isn't boring for her.

As for me, it's pretty bland and free of affectionate animals. I'm living up the college student lifestyle in this fantastic 1BR apartment I've secured for my work week. In the first several hours, I found dead wasps and dead spiders in places you don't want to find lifeforms that can bite or sting. Death seems to be a persistent theme in this dwelling, though. When my mind quiets down and I just try to relax, I really begin to notice the absence of certain conveniences to which I'd grown accustomed... like ice makers and a paint color that isn't just some shade of white or "beige."

What I will say about this area is that there's a fantastic Chinese take-out spot on the edge of town. Sesame Chicken is the great equalizer among Americanized Asian dishes. It's not at all a Chinese dish. Let us recall that Sesame Chicken (a close relative of the famous General Tso) is just fried chicken, some sort of brown-and-sweet sauce, and rice. My policy has always been to opt for the steamed rice when the fried meat is doused in a heavy sauce. Don't get me wrong, I'll totally drown that steamed rice in a flood of soy sauce. It's not a health decision to forgo the fried rice, but I think it's a necessary choice that brings a better balance to the meal. Sweetness and saltiness should play nicely with the savory. Still, speaking of bad decisions, I got the "combo" that included an egg roll. It turned out to be quite forgettable and much unlike the life-changing appetizer I found back in the city. Still, the meal as a whole was quite satisfying. Not because it was particularly exquisite, though; it was good. But more importantly, it was reliable. I could walk into a new place in a new town and walk out with a meal that tasted exactly like I expected it to taste. For that, I commend the chef (and his thousands of counterparts all over this great nation).

Speaking of reliability, one should toss all expectations out the window when shopping for groceries at Walmart; a lesson I should have remembered from my younger days when going to Walmart was the thing to do on a Saturday. But when you're 31 and trying to [minimally] furnish a small apartment in a small town, it's inevitable that you're eventually lured into the doors of that monstrosity which evolved from Sam Walton's original five-and-dime. It's highly likely that in the process of throwing some $0.97 ice cube trays into your cart you might hope for the best and snatch some turkey burgers and freezer fries, thinking "hey, for this price, how bad can they be?"

Throwing all caution to the wind, you might even attempt to cook these items using your highly-unpredictable new oven and decades-old George Forman grill. (Well, surely I could have shot lower, but it turns out my weekday apartment didn't come furnished with a microwave.) I don't claim to predict the exact results of your particular situation, but I'll admit that it didn't go so well for me. Whether it was the meat quality or the unreliable grilling surface, I don't know. Something went wrong. Even melting some legitimate name-brand cheddar on the bun didn't really make this a tasty meal. Surprisingly, tossing the freezer fries in just a splash of olive oil made them the highlight of the meal. The rest was just cardboard-masquerading-as-turkey. Tolerable... but, eh. Actually it was quite reminiscent of the overall picture of being two hours from the only person in the world that matters to me... and the six seven four-legged critters. To be fair, it's only night two. Things will hopefully improve on the cooking front soon.